Winnipeg Free Press - April 14, 2008

Brad Oswald's Comedy Fest Blog

Debaters the Second produced just as many funny fireworks as the radio-recorded effort’s first show did on Saturday. Sunday’s matchups included the much-anticipated chest-thump-off between Bruce Clark and Mel (Dan Licoppe) Silverback, the tuxedo-clad mountain-gorilla mouthpiece last seen swinging southward during 2007’s Last Comic Standing semi-finals. Their topic: whether zoos should be closed. Arguing for the proposed ban, more-or-less-upright-walking Elmwood product Clark: “Opponents would argue that zoos are artificial, and created only for the entertainment of humans. Well, so are Pamela Anderson’s breasts, and that doesn’t make THEM wrong.” Zoo-closure advocate Mel’s response: “Let me say, Mr. Clark, that if I had some feces right now, I would fling it at you.”

Mike Wilmot and Kate Davis argued about whether kids today receive too much praise. A cleaned-up-for-radio Wilmot, who actually might be as crusty as his trademark rasp makes him sound, offered this life-lesson nugget: “Try your best, or, at least, SAY you tried your best — then you can be a hero among stupid people … and that’s where the money is, anyway.”

Rick Currie, filling in for the absent A. Whitney Brown, took on fest A.D. Al Rae; the topic: whether lawns should be outlawed. Rae’s grim position: “Every drop of sprinkler water is a spit in the face of a starving child;” and “Lawns create unhealthy competition; your neighbour gets a leaf blower, you get a leaf blower; he gets a tractor mower, you get a tractor mower; pretty soon you have to nail his wife just to keep your dignity.” Currie’s approach was a bit more HANDS on: “I have the best-looking lawn on my block. It isn’t hard to achieve — all you have to do is water it in the morning, mow it in the evening, and then late at night, spread salt on your neighbours’ lawns.”

Simon Rakoff and Ray Hanania managed to wring some laughs out of the touchy subject of whether Canada should do more for Palestine; Sabrina Jalees and Erica Sigurdson found some funny wrinkles in the fashion industry, and in the main event, Wilmot and Derek Edwards traded shots like Rocky Balboa and Apollo Creed in a shout-off over whether it’s big cities or small towns that are the heart and soul of Canada. All funny stuff, and it was also impressive that it was a sold-out house on a Sunday afternoon when the sun was shining outside and there was a whole lot going on, sports-wise, on the teevee. During a re-set between radio-taping setups, host Steve Patterson encouraged the crowd to keep its spirits up. “Are you guys still with me?” he asked. After the expected wave of cheers subsided, one lonely, let’s-wrap-it-up-inclined voice was heard from the back of the seating area: “We’re missing the curling final!”

Didn’t make it to Sunday night’s fest-finishing panel/Desi-Show combo, or to the waning-hours schmooze at the GST, as the sniffles had descended in full force and The Masters was on the tube. And as anyone knows, missing the first major of the televised golf season would NOT be funny.

So, that’s about it. Hope this was fun, despite that unexpected lull in the middle. Sorry the vid-clip thing didn’t work out as well as we’d hoped. Until next year, then…..

Globe and Mail - July 30th, 2006

COMEDY

JUST FOR LAUGHS CBC 8 PM

Next week, the mother corp bounces this series for clips of the 2006 Winnipeg Comedy Festival. The final episode features a handful of the usual wise guys, including Finesse Mitchell of Saturday Night Live, Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood of the improv series Whose Line is it Anyway?, the indefatigable Simon Rakoff, and Irish comic Dylan Moran, who ironically is best known to Canadian audiences as the straight man in the zombie comedy Shaun of the Dead.

Uptown Magazine - April 6, 2006

A Rare Pair

By Sharilyn Johnson

Just how rare is it to see brothers Simon and David Rakoff on the same bill?

“The only time we ever worked together was at summer camp,” says Simon. “We
once sang Cow Cow Boogie.”

The chances of seeing that number revived for Meet The Rakoffs at the Gas
Station Theatre on Thursday night are slim to none -- as entertaining as it
would be -- but it's certain The Rakoff boys will have something similarly
funny on offer.

Simon, older by four years, has been doing standup since 1978. He’s a
self-proclaimed “grizzled veteran” according to his tongue-in-cheek username
on a Toronto comedy messageboard. He doesn’t tour much, preferring to work
in the Toronto area so he can spend time with his five-year-old daughter.

David is the author of two popular books: Fraud, a collection of very funny
essays, and Don’t Get Too Comfortable, a commentary on American excess. He’s
also a journalist, National Public Radio contributor, and actor. His name
is attached the most intellectually hip projects: He’s in Capote and the
upcoming Strangers With Candy movie, has directed and performed in plays by
Amy and David Sedaris, and provided the voice of Thomas Jefferson in the
audiobook version of the Daily Show¹s America: The Book.

Their lives have a very different pace and style, which of course wasn¹t
always the case.

“We were close growing up,” David says.

“We were small. We were bookish,” says Simon. “We got along quite well as
kids. We spent a lot of time together”.

Clearly, theirs wasn’t the stereotypical brother relationship, characterized
by constant bullying.

“We weren¹t like that. We were more likely to be putting on a play,” Simon
says. He jokes that if anything, it would be the two of them plotting
against their sister, Ruth, the middle child of the three.

Both Rakoff boys followed their creative callings in their late teens. Simon
started doing standup while he was in high school, and David moved to New
York.

“The truth is, we don¹t know each other that well as adults. [David] left
home at 17 to go to Columbia University and was gone from there,” says
Simon. “And by the point he had left home, I had already left, certainly
mentally, before then. I had left university and was pursuing my comedy
career, which was not, as I say, in the family plan.”

That ‘family plan’ is a gently skirted issue. David rarely mentions his
family in interviews or in his work. Simon characterizes his parents as
being very funny and a likely source of his comedic inspiration, but as for
his decision to be a comedian, Simon will only explain that it’s more
acceptable to them now than it was initially.

“I think as time has passed, and I’ve done okay, and they’ve seen the
relative unhappiness that can accompany a more secure but less rewarding
job, they’ve come to accept, at least, what I do,” he says. “But I think it
worries them still. It¹s not financially secure, what I do. My brother has
done extremely well, so I think that makes them relax and feel good.”

While being funny is a big part of David’s career, the comedy industry isn’t
the world he lives in. He says he almost never watches standup, and hasn¹t
even seen Simon¹s act in many years.

Furthermore, anyone who’s read Fraud might be surprised to see David at a
comedy festival. His essay The Best Medicine, about his experience at the US
Comedy Arts Festival in Aspen, details his distaste for the self-absorbed
nature of such affairs.

“There’s absolutely nothing wrong with a community getting together to be
with itself and toast itself. But it was the sense that one got that one was
actually attending the League of Nations,” David says.

He doesn¹t anticipate a similar level of ego-feeding in Winnipeg, though.

“It doesn’t strike me as being all that self-congratulatory a venue,” he
says of our festival. “[Simon] says it’s about the nicest, most congenial
atmosphere he¹s ever been in, with incredibly lovely people.”

Indeed, Simon cites his time at the 2004 festival as the most fun he’s ever
had, and he¹s looking forward to catching up with colleagues with whom he
doesn¹t often work.

“For me it¹s fun, because after 28 years [in comedy] there¹s a lot of
people I know,” he says. “It’s always nice to run into old friends who you
hardly ever get to see.”

Globe and Mail - July 28, 2005

Just for Laughs: What a riot!

By Michael Posner

...Some Canadian comics also scored well, including the always reliable Jeremy Hotz, who has just struck a sitcom deal with the CBC, and the droll Simon Rakoff, who made the most of his first JFL appearance.

Now - May 30, 2002

Comedy Q&A

By Glenn Sumi

Simon Rakoff

A good MC is the unsung hero of the comedy clubs, and Simon Rakoff -- who's been performing since the late 70s -- is one of the best. The quick-on-his-feet stand-up always makes it look easy, engaging audiences with his conversational style and dead-on observations. He's sold jokes to Jay Leno and has appeared on Open Mike With Mike Bullard more than any other comic, but he's best known these days for his hosting duties at the Laugh Resort. This Saturday, he performs a must-see rare headline set there. See comedy listings, page 164, for details.

What's the main difference between hosting and headlining?

The headliner is treated with reverence and awe. Oh, the main difference? $68.

You're good at ad libbing. What does that really mean?

I'm too lazy to come up with any new material until I'm actually onstage.

What should we do with hecklers?

Grind them up and serve them as meatballs at a Just For Laughs gala.

If there were a Simon Rakoff pizza, what toppings would be on it?

All I know is there would be a bald spot in the middle.

Are the playoffs good for comedy clubs?

Sure, Leafs fans need cheering up.

Cheapest meal under $5? Pizza delivered late.

You're the love child of two celebs -- who are they?

Lenny Bruce and Julie Andrews.

Are you going to pay $145 to see Robin Williams?

I wouldn't take $145 to see Robin Williams.

Patch Adams or Jumanji?

Jumanji, because his life is in danger throughout.

What does Cirque du Soleil mean in English?

"If you could bend like this, you wouldn't need a girlfriend."

What does it mean in Yiddish?

"Oy, my back!"

If there were a Simon Rakoff action figure, what would it do?

Mock GI Joe until he cried.

Winnipeg Free Press - April 6, 2006

Brad Oswald's Comedy Fest Blog

Meanwhile, over at the Gas Station — where I ended up after beating a hasty Pantages retreat just past the midway point of the gala — the brothers Rakoff (author/radio commentator David and standup guy Simon) were having a lovely time with their first-ever combined show. Simon delivered standup, David offered readings from his prose, and at the end, the two took the stage together for an audience Q&A session that was probably the highlight of the night for both the performers and the audience. Someone asked if the sibling duo — David, of New York, and Simon, of Toronto — were planning to take the newly formed act on the road. “No,” deadpanned Simon. “We’re not going to tour. We’re never going to do this again, probably. You lucky Winnipeg people are the only ones who will see this.” Rest of the planet’s loss, I say.

Eye - March 8, 2001

LAUGH RESORT WILL HAVE LAST LAUGH

As a 23-year veteran of Toronto's stand-up comedy scene, I would like to comment on Andrew Clark's piece on the Laugh Resort (Comedy, Mar. 1). There were a number of points with which I disagree.

First and most obviously, the name of the owner of the club is Ellen Wagner, not Klein (where did he get that?). More importantly, his assertion that comics are censored is patently untrue. I have worked at the Laugh Resort since its inception and have never been told what material to do or not do.

As in all venues, the audience decides what material is desirable. The more mature crowd that the Laugh Resort draws is less likely to respond to some of the harsher material that plays elsewhere. That does not mean that management tries to influence the talent, who are free to express our viewpoints in comedy as we see fit.

As far as the acts that have moved on to bigger and better things are concerned, they all have fond memories of the club and often drop in to do sets when they are visiting from Los Angeles or wherever their careers have taken them.

It is understandable that some acts choose to work with Yuk Yuk's, whose multi-club chain can afford them more stage time and money. By the same token, those of us who choose to forsake that opportunity and work at the Laugh Resort in spite of Mark Breslin's exclusivity policy do so because we appreciate the respectful treatment that we receive from Ellen Wagner. Comedians like myself, Tim Steeves, Miller Crosby, Barry Kennedy, Steve Levine, Harry Doupe, Fraser Young and numerous other top Canadian stand-up comics are proud to be associated with the Laugh Resort and trust that a discerning public will continue to support our brand of comedy. -- SIMON RAKOFF

Eye - July 17, 1997

Please Welcome Your Host For The Evening

by Shane MacDougall

They are the unsung heroes. Willing to take a bullet for their comrades, these brave souls face down a potentially ugly death night after night. They are the unknown soldiers who MC comedy shows, a spot shunned by all who can avoid it (though almost every comic eventually gets nailed with the job).

To the average audience member, the MC's job might seem pretty innocuous: just come out and introduce the acts. But there's much more to it. As any comedian will tell you, the host can make or break a show. He or she has an unenviable task: to settle a rowdy audience, start them laughing and get them laughing again after a comic has just tanked.

"Your most important job is off the top, relaxing the audience and reassuring them that they're going to have a good time," says veteran host Simon Rakoff, arguably the best MC in the independent circuit. "People are dubious in a comedy club. They think everybody's funny and it's your job to set the tone and say, 'Okay we're really professionally funny.' "

It's also a job that most comedians shun, since it forces them into a dialogue with the audience, which means abandoning scripted material and placing their set in the hands of fate.

"I don't like emceeing because it forces you to break the fourth wall," admits comic Tim Rykert, a regular host at the Laugh Resort. "If I want to break that wall, I want to do that by choice. But when you MC, it's broken before you get up there."

As important a role as it is, being the MC will not make a comic famous nor garner him or her accolades. Many audience members don't even realize that the host is also a comic. "You were funny -- you should try being a comedian too!" is a phrase that MCs hear often.

"You have to sublimate your ego for the good of the acts," says Rakoff. "Your job's to get the audience going and bring somebody on, not get them going and keep going and build and build your set." But some MC's are so accomplished, such as Mike Bullard, Mike Wilmot (both of Yuk Yuk's) and Rakoff (of the Laugh Resort) that they are highly regarded as masters of the form.

In the U.S., however, the MC is viewed (often correctly) as a lower life form. He's invariably an amateur and sometimes the club owner, dying to prove he's truly a funny guy.

"It really just makes them sacrificial lambs," says Rykert. "That hurts the show because the audience is really seeing an amateur show until the headliner hits the stage. A really good MC raises the level of a show from front to back."

Eye - May 9, 1996

Take A Number

By Shane MacDougall

Producer Joe Bodolai has begun doling out Comics! episodes. So far he has only 10 slots available to him from the CBC, and the confirmed recipients are Tim Steeves and Jamie Olivier (both doing their second episode), Craig Campbell and Simon Rakoff. Bodolai will undoubtedly be feeling the crunch as the dozens of deserving comedians jockey for the few precious slots.

Eye - May 2, 1996

SIMON SAYS

By Shane MacDougall

Comedian Simon Rakoff once arrived at a gig in Calgary only to find that the marquee out front read, "Appearing This Week: Simon Rakoti." When he asked about it, the manager replied "We needed the f's for 'buffet.' "

Too ucking much.

Rakoff, 35, has been involved in the Toronto comedy scene since he was 17, starting out at the then newly opened Yuk Yuk's club on Bay St. The business has changed much, and Rakoff has been in on many of the changes. When stand-up began to boom in the early '80s, for example, he organized his stablemates and demanded that they be paid. Later, Rakoff was hand-picked by Mike MacDonald to co-write (along with Harold Nemetz) the CBC sitcom Mosquito Lake. The show was supposed to have been the motherlode. Instead, it became the Corp's most famous failure.

Not all his TV experience has left such a bad aftertaste. Rakoff wrote and appeared on Switchback with Eric Tunney ("I played all the negative characters"), and wrote for the second season of We Don't Knock. Recently he got a call from CBC Radio's Anton Leo (of Nip And Tuck fame) to develop a pilot for a comedy series. With any luck, he hopes to land a permanent gig , and hopefully a speaking role. "I'm ideal; I've got the delivery for comedy and a face for radio!"

Rakoff is once again at the centre of changes in the local comedy scene, this time as host of one of the most successful of the new independently run shows -- at the trendy College St. restaurant Tasca (598 College St.).

The past few years have seen a watershed of comedy. With a glut of comedians and a shortage of stage time, the opportunity for established comics to try out new material has become minimal. Owners expect comics to kill. Don't, and you may not be back for awhile. This has led to comics starting their own independent gigs where they can float as many new jokes as they wish -- at places like The Oasis, The Pilot Tavern and of course, Tasca.

Rakoff has been hosting the free admission, open-mike comedy and music show there with musician Marion Law one Monday per month for the past six months. Tasca has become one of the most popular shows in the city, with some of the country's top acts dropping in to do sets. Rakoff knew he had a successful show on his hands when comedians began calling him for spots: recent appearances include Lawrence Morgenstern, Chris Finn, Steve Shuster and one of the mainstays of Canadian comedy, Dave Broadfoot.

Confirmed acts for next week's show (May 6) include a rare appearance from Paul Irving, Brad Lyons, and Second City alumnus Ron James. James is a character comic who resembles a Nova Scotian Robin Williams -- his ultra-hyper act always seems to please. Lyons, 140 pounds soaking wet, uses his build to advantage throughout his act, and is producing consistently solid sets. Paul Irving is an industry favorite. On the few occasions he gigs, the room is filled with comedians.

As host, Rakoff relishes the spot most comedians dread. A regular at the Laugh Resort, he is also considered one of the city's best MCs. "MCing gives me the sort of feeling a Marine must feel," he says. "I mean, the infantry takes the beach once the mines and snipers have been cleared, but the Marines are the guys that get in there and clean the mines and snipers out." (As many comics will tell you, weeding out hecklers and settling a rowdy crowd can be more dangerous than storming Iwo Jima.)

Rakoff uses his ability to spritz with ease; no audience has gotten the better of him. At a recent Easter weekend show, someone revealed that they worked for a greeting card company. Rakoff turned this information into a killer five-minute riff on how Hallmark cards were behind the crucifixion of Jesus, in order to move Easter cards. His onstage success is due also to the accessibility of his act. Rakoff covers everything from voicemail to religion.

"I'm Jewish," one bit goes. "Such a tentative word, Jew, hyphen, ish. Think about it -- 'When's dinner?' 'Eight-ish.' 'Are you a Jew?' 'Jew-ish.' "

There are few comedians as consistent as Rakoff. It's absurd that he hasn't yet had a Comics episode. But Rakoff isn't too anxious about getting 'the big break.' His low-key approach is best reflected by one of his favorite jokes.

"The warnings on cigarette packages don't have much effect on me. 'Cigarette Smoking Reduces Life Expectancy.' That's OK. I never really expected that much from life to begin with."

Eye - September 15, 1994

THE ULTIMATE GUIDE TO TORONTO COMEDY
Who's Who And What They Do In The Toronto Comedy

by Andrew Clark

Simon Rakoff - A seasoned veteran, (he began around 13 years ago) Rakoff delivers set-up/punchline humor in a disciplined and rewarding manner.

Eye - September 1, 1994

RESORTING TO RAKOFF

By Andrew Clark

Simon Rakoff skipped town and flew to Los Angeles a year ago. The veteran stand-up is back and headlines The Laugh Resort Sept. 1-3. His biggest L.A. memories are being the token heterosexual at The Comedy Store's Gay Night and being caught by the earthquake while playing Sega Golf at Mike MacDonald's house: "And I was up by thousands of dollars -- I'd birdied three holes in a row." He says he's also learned how to cook great chili rellenos (stuffed chili peppers).

The biggest difference between L.A. and Hogtown humor? "Down there they're all concerned about their careers. Here, there isn't much career, so people concentrate on their acts."

Eye August 13, 1992

FUNNY BY FAX

Joke Pro Simon Rakoff Works The Wire

By Andrew Clark

When I arrive at Simon Rakoff's Bathurst & Eglinton flat for our 1 p.m. interview he's glued to his television watching The Apartment, a classic Billy Wilder comedy starring Jack Lemmon, Fred MacMurray and Shirley Maclaine. "I just love seeing Fred MacMurray as a bad guy," he says.

Normally, Rakoff, 32, a Toronto-based comedian, professional joke writer, and purveyor of fine scripts, would be in a creative uproar. But today he can relax because he and his partner Howard Nemetz write jokes for Jay Leno, and since The Tonight Show has been pre-empted for the Olympics, they have less work to do.

They're not really Tonight Show writers -- they write jokes and fax them to Jay Leno. Sometimes Jay likes them and does them on the show.

Rakoff and Nemetz "commute back and forth between Toronto and L.A." Nemetz, 35, is the main L.A. connection. Rakoff spends most of his time here. They pass jokes back and forth by fax and phone until they're happy with the product. Then Nemetz faxes them off to prospective buyers like the Tonight Show and Arsenio.

So far they've sold Jay three jokes in three weeks, which sounds pretty good until Rakoff mentions that Tonight pays $50 a joke. Then again, it's the prestige, not the money, that really counts. I ask Rakoff to tell me one of his Leno lines.

"A cab driver in Denver -- this is true -- was shot in the face, but he survived because his dentures stopped the bullet. Wow, and I was impressed in that commercial when the woman could eat an apple."

Rakoff, a stocky guy, tells me to make myself comfortable and leads me to his study. Stacks of scripts clutter the floor around his computer work station. "I don't want to torture you," he apologizes while handing me a stack of scripts a foot high. "On the other hand we've written a lot of stuff." To Rakoff, good comedy is like judo. "It's keeping people off balance. If they expect you to push, you pull."

That's how Rakoff runs his act. He's a skilled stand-up (The Laugh Resort, Aug. 20-22) with an intelligent, pointed act. He finds humor in his everyday life, his wife's panty-hose, his job, his Jewish heritage. Rakoff says Jewish holidays are odd: "Somebody tried to kill all the Jews. They were only able to kill a large number of Jews and so we celebrate."

A few years back he and Nemetz, both former Yuk Yuk's comics, decided to go on what's sardonically known in comedy circles as the paper chase -- the hot pursuit of that big television or film-writing gig.

"We realized that neither of us was going to be an important stand-up," he candidly confesses. "We're both good, we're both professional, we make a living at it, but I think you recognize that certain guys have the power to be important stars and others will always be just OK."

But Rakoff and Nemetz's ship may yet come in. They're currently completing work on the second draft of a movie in the Mel Brooks/Airplane mold and it's managed to pique the interest of a number of producers. Rakoff won't go into detail because he says he's terrified someone might steal the idea.

The process of getting that big money gig is a strange one. The common route most comedy scribes take is writing dummy scripts for already successful television shows. Rakoff and Nemetz have written (but not yet sold) episodes of Roseanne, The Wonder Years, Murphy Brown, Coach and Brooklyn Bridge.

But the lack of really solid bites hasn't discouraged Rakoff, who remains convinced that he's got a good shot at success in the American market. One reason so many Canadians are successful Stateside, he says, is that "We're close enough that we get the detail right but we're far enough away that we don't have a personal stake in the seriousness of their point of view. I mean, look at America. I always think of Hulk Hogan, you know the wrestler, as the perfect analogy. Here's this huge guy beating up guys much smaller that him and he's the hero. I mean, only in America could you see it that way."